Celebrelations

Now I care mildly about pop culture as much as the next non-gender specific being, but one thing I have little patience for is the shortening of celebrity couple names to a concoction of each person’s name. I think I get it. You want to refer to your celebrity couples in the shortest “word” possible so that you have more time to jack-off to People’s 2008 Best Dressed list. What I don’t understand about the whole thing though is how to decide which celebrity couples are worthy of a couplename. Some of the existing ones (Bennifer and Brangelina for example) are a little obvious and fairly boring. Why not include last names too and give them to couples who have cooler names to begin with? I know they’re not a couple anymore (see, I’m hip), but Carmen Electra and Dave Navarro would be Electravarro. Now THAT’s one hell of a celebrity couple name. Not only does it sound like a Spanish superhero, but it’s also fun to say. Surely there are more like that one. Wait a second, I think I REALLY get it now... it’s actually fun to think these things up! However, since I still don’t understand who gets a couplename, I’m going to do what I always do when I don’t quite understand the rules to something: I’m making up my own rules.

Rule #1 – You can use last names
Rule #2 – Couples’ names must form something silly or immature
Rule #3 – Couples are completely hypothetical (so just like with sex, dead people are fair game)

Well, that about does it for the rulebook. Now it's time to make with the funny:

Matt Dillon & Bridget Bardot = DillDo.
John Wayne & Miley Cyrus = WaynUs.
Peta Wilson & Peter Gabriel = PePe.Any of the Hanson sisters & Steve Jobs = HanJobs.Marcia Gay-Hardin & Gerard Butler = Gay-HardinBut.











Sorry I didn’t do pictures for all of them, there just really aren’t funny pictures of some people (thanks for screwing the pooch, Marcia Gay-Hardin). Let me know if you think of any good couplenames.